


my baby's gone with the wind again

by TheBlackestFrost



Category: American Gods (TV), American Gods - Neil Gaiman
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, F/M, Shadow POV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-23
Updated: 2019-11-23
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:00:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21527971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBlackestFrost/pseuds/TheBlackestFrost
Summary: “It’s like watching a woman trying to find something in a handbag, isn’t it?”Wednesday’s voice is just behind him, low and just mild enough that it makes his lip curl.He grits his teeth to stop from agreeing.What Shadow sees.
Relationships: Laura Moon/Mad Sweeney
Comments: 15
Kudos: 126





	my baby's gone with the wind again

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to Ettume for the excellent, meandering chats from which this came.

The first time he sees them it’s only a few weeks after the nightmare in Cairo.

He’s sitting in a café with Wednesday, resentfully drinking a hot chocolate with too many marshmallows and struggling to figure out why he is still working for the admittedly charming sociopath. Shadow knows, deep down, but he’s not interested in exploring that, not right now.

The car that pulls into the gas station across the street is older, in decent condition, but it’s the driver, exiting to fill it up, that catches his attention.

Sweeney, healthy and hale and actually fucking alive, fills up the tank while talking to someone in the car.

He is hit with a pang of something, relief or guilt or shock or all three. Alive. 

The door is kicked open and then slammed shut and Shadow is surprised, but feels he probably shouldn’t be, to see Laura stomping around. He can’t make out what is being said but he’s seen Laura shout enough to know it’s probably not good.

She’s pointing at Sweeney and then crossing her arms before throwing them into the sky as if unable to comprehend a specific level of stupidity. For his part Sweeney has finished filling up, towering over her now as the argument continues, and for a moment Shadow wonders if he should be leaping up to intervene.

He doesn’t.

Laura, unfazed by the giant looming over her, reaches into Sweeney’s jacket and roots around as they continue their animated exchange. 

“It’s like watching a woman trying to find something in a handbag, isn’t it?”

Wednesday’s voice is just behind him, low and just mild enough that it makes his lip curl.

He grits his teeth to stop from agreeing.

For his part Sweeney is still giving as good as he’s getting, apparently unconcerned with her casual body search, and when she pulls away with a handful of cash he doesn’t stop her.

Laura has gone inside and Sweeney is leaning against the hood of the car, lighting a cigarette. He doesn’t look particularly stressed by the fighting, in fact Shadow’s not sure he’s ever seen the big man look calmer or lighter, as if something weighing him down has long since been removed.

Shadow doesn’t bother to turn to Wednesday.

“You knew he was… alive? Back? Whatever he is?

In his periphery he sees Wednesday shrug and wants to hit him for the casual nonchalance. 

“He’s too dumb to stay dead.”

Laura has paid and is striding back, coming to stand between Sweeney’s legs in front of the car. She puts some change and a candy bar in a shiny wrapping in his pocket, and Sweeney is looking down at her smugly as she takes his cigarette and has a drag.

Shadow watches as Sweeney leans towards Laura, watches as she doesn’t move away, watches as something he says to her makes her roll her eyes and smile. She hands back the cigarette and climbs back in the car. Sweeney stands, taking a final drag and smiling to himself before flicking it away.

And Shadow can’t help but think he might not be that dumb at all.

XXX

The next time it happens, it’s in the middle of a battle.

While he’s 90% sure that New Media and her goons are actually trying to eliminate TechBoy and using other gods as a call to arms, Shadow can’t ignore the fact that Wednesday stands to benefit if either side loses, meaning he’s also 90% sure his boss has orchestrated this whole thing.

He’s heard that others have something to lose, so as the now an abandoned mall becomes a battle ground, he’s not too surprised to see a flash of red hair followed by several people being bowled over. Mad Sweeney joins the fray near the Claire's with the broken window, grinning and moving like a man in his element as he leaps over a sunglasses kiosk to throw a haymaker at a green juice wielding wellness guru. 

Shadow is ducking New Media’s terrifying influencer army (digitally enhanced humans are the creepiest to look at, doll like and smoothed out by Photoshop and painful to hit) when he sees her. Laura, there on the edge of the battle, pulling a dazed looking YouTuber out of some kind of trance and then sending another flying into a Victoria's Secret.

He remembers seeing her crush a skull on the train, and flinches now at her blood splattered face.

She holds her own comfortably until she trips against the mall fountain. She’s nearly overwhelmed by a huge number of beauty tutorials and prankster vlogs, laughing and repeating “heyyouguysheyyouguysheyyouguys” in bright or smarmy tones.

Shadow moves towards her but stops when he hears a shout.

“Boost!”

The bellow cuts through the sounds of bodies and tech colliding and Shadow watches as Laura turns to Sweeney.

The big man hurls two MommyBlogs off his back and holds his hands together without looking at Laura as she runs and jumps, using him as a spring board to kip into the air, flipping behind her nearest assailant and landing on its back. She plunges a fist through its shoulders, hand coming away with a bloody spine, and pushing off as the corpse lands, hard.

Shadow is briefly distracted by being thrown through the window of a Bait and Tackle shop only to find a small hand gripping his arm and pulling him upright easily.

Laura gives him a quick smile before another bellow cuts over them.

“ROD!”

She rolls her eyes but moves quickly, grabbing a thick fishing rod and flinging it over Shadow's head and towards the food court. Sweeney snatches it mid-flight and redirects it into the chest of one attacker, pushing him back into another and another until their bodies were pinned against a wall.

As the dust settles, tech splitting and glitching into nothingness, gods and deities eye one another warily and begin to depart.

Shadow sees Wednesday waving him over but turns to watch as Sweeney and Laura come together, eyes running over one another perfunctorily, a quick review of any injuries. There’s no panic, it’s more like a quick cataloguing, taking in blood and bruising.

Finding nothing of concern they return to what seems to be a favourite pastime.

"You're not getting me in there again."

"Seriously, you won't go in Victoria's Secret?"

"Last time you looked at fucking t-shirts for an hour, woman."

"They're comfy!"

"They have panties with less coverage than floss and you-"

"Come on, Ginger Minge."

As Shadow moves to follow Wednesday he sees Sweeney slinging an arm over Laura’s shoulders as if to steady himself, and she lets him, leading him towards the store in question with a grin.

XXX

What a difference a year makes.

Had it truly been only a year? A year since the war, since the downfall, since the strange and curious process of rebuilding lives from decimation?

Had it truly been only a year since he'd pushed a spear through the heart of the man in front of him, larger than life and clearly enjoying every minute of it as he wolfed down a burger the size of a dinner plate?

Shadow had run into Laura near here, been asked to join her for a meal. He really shouldn't have been surprised that Sweeney was here, or that Laura didn't even think to mention it.

Apparently they're just a package deal now.

When a glass of whisky is placed in front of Sweeney he grabs it without a word, sniffing and then taking a hefty drink before returning to his meal. Shadow stares as Laura, alive (or something like it) and healthy slides in beside the other man, who shifts his plate over slightly so it’s nearer to her. She takes a few fries, sips her vodka, and gives Shadow a smile.

“It’s good to see you.”

She means it, that’s what’s so strange about all of this, and he tries to figure out how he feels about that.

She starts to talk, snippets of life in the last 12 months, of what it takes to resurrect a Fae King and life on the road and fairy gardens, mermaids, Salim and the Jinn.

Shadow barely hears her, too busy watching the scene in front of him.

As she speaks she reaches to pluck a cigarette from behind Sweeney’s ear, and then pats herself down before reaching a hand into Sweeney’s jacket and coming away with a lighter.

Something about their easy proximity makes his stomach twist.

The entire time she’s chatting away, but Sweeney has caught Shadow’s eye and is watching him warily.

_“Don’t let him near her.”_

_“Why do you care?”_

_“He’s using you, Shadow.”_

_“You owe me a coin, Moon Shadow.”_

Laura continues speaking, unaware of what is passing between the two of them, and though Sweeney doesn’t look inclined to fight (for once), his expression clearly says that if Shadow wants one, he’ll be happy to oblige.

“So, where has he got you going this time?” Shadow barely hears, too busy watching the way Laura returns the lighter to Sweeney’s pocket and slumps back against the booth, crossing her legs and taking a drag. She's sitting close enough to be pressed against Sweeney's side, denim against her bare arm, and Sweeney eats his burger with his other hand.

Shadow starts to explain the last few months, Wednesday's disappearance, his hope to travel to Lakeside, but there's something strange sitting in his throat as if he is angry or should be angry or feels like he should feel angry and he can't seem to swallow any of it down. Sweeney has stopped watching him but he's all too aware that the other man knows what he's thinking, and resists the temptation to start a fight just to have a way to process things. 

Sweeney looks around the bar and catches sight of something, Shadow thinks perhaps the tired looking whack-a-mole game in the corner, and is about to speak when Laura cuts across him without looking.

"No."

"But-"

"No."

"Well why the fuc-"

“Because last time you frightened the other patrons so badly they kicked us out before you even got to finish.”

“I fucking never-“

"No."

Sweeney growls low and she rolls her eyes, clearly not backing down. 

She leaves for the bathroom ("seriously, no") and Shadow is left to stare at Sweeney, who stops glaring at her retreating back and returns the stare, finishing the last of his burger and lighting a cigarette. Neither speaks for a moment until Sweeney decides to acknowledge it.

“If you’re raw, we’ll go at it. She’ll stay out of it.”

For a moment Shadow wants very much to “go at it” because it’s said so reasonably and honestly that he knows, full well, that Sweeney will let him go to town and Laura won’t intervene. The fact that Sweeney knows she won’t irks Shadow more than the geniality with which the offer is made, as if they know one another well enough to anticipate reactions to that extent. Or had already talked about it.

Either way.

Shadow wants to get angry but Laura has looked comfortable and at ease in a way he’s never seen before and he has little interest in creating more enemies with people who have tried to warn him and save him before. He exhales slowly, sipping his own drink and avoiding Sweeney's eyes.

“She’s…she’s not my Laura anymore.”

It’s a denial he’s given himself time and time again; this fierce and bitchy woman snapping and crackling her way through life is nothing like the melancholy beauty he married, the sweetheart who kept him in bed all day Sundays. She still cared, clearly and genuinely, about Shadow. He knows Salim sees her regularly, knows she has a reputation in this strange world of theirs as someone who will fight for the light, the right, at least on her terms. But there’s something raw and stripped about her now, bratty and wild and…not who she was.

"You reckon, huh?" Sweeney, never willing to let a moment of dishonesty pass unexamined, squints at him curiously as he exhales a plume of smoke. “Was she ever?”

Shadow glares, knowing Sweeney is waiting his response, knowing the other man is seeing more than he lets on and pushing Shadow to acknowledge, understand, be honest with himself. He's not exactly challenging him to piss him off, but Shadow can tell Sweeney is pulling at a loose thread, and he grits his teeth against the feeling of unravelling. 

Asshole. 

He thinks about _his_ Laura. Coffee in the kitchen and calling him puppy and sadness in her eyes. His Laura who had looked so beautiful on their wedding day and who had cried and he was mostly sure it was from happiness. His Laura with sparks of life and interest when there was risk, or danger, or threat. 

His Laura who had tried to plead but ultimately let him take the fall in prison, who had stayed faithful for a year and month before fucking her best friend’s shitty husband, who had died with another man’s cock in her throat.

He meets Sweeney's eyes and the thread unravels. 

His Laura has never existed.

He refuses to answer but they both know what he’s saying, and Sweeney nods, willing to take his silence as the closest to honestly they’ll both get.

Shadow wants the focus off him. “So…what…you’re together now?”

Sweeney shrugs. “Something like that.”

He can’t help the smile in his voice and Shadow wants to poke at _him_ for once.

“What does that mean? She’s your girlfriend? You’re gonna get married and live happily ever after? What does together mean to a fucking magical creature?”

Sweeney’s eyes are very old for a moment and Shadow is reminded, again, that being a big horny meathead doesn’t necessarily mean a person is dumb.

“Means belonging to someone.”

He stubs out the cigarette and says nothing further.

When Laura comes she pointedly ignores the tension, passing Sweeney the cheque in a move that, although silent, is nothing short of an order. He rolls his eyes and obeys.

She looks down at Shadow and gives him that little smile that used to warm all of him and now makes him feel…happy, if he’s honest with himself, though in a very different way.

“I hope you’re being careful.”

Shadow nods, though they both know that this space into which they were dragged is anything but safe, and puts a hand over hers. He can see her then, kindness and strength but also a fiercely selfish spirit who is relishing this life in a way that she had never done so before. Even dead, rotting and grey, eyes milky and flies circling, she had seemed charged by whatever purpose was driving her, by the adventure and participation in something greater than herself. First him, and then...he doesn't follow the thought any further.

Maybe it was belief, or something like it.

Now, alive but somehow more, she is comfortable in a way he can see clearly. She wears death and rebirth well, he thinks, and the hard knot of anger he didn't realise he was still carrying in his chest loosens into an unrestrictive, mild ache.

When Sweeney returns he takes in their clasped hands and says nothing, showing little interest in jealousy, and Shadow wonders if that’s the security that belonging creates. They nod their goodbyes, well aware that their paths will cross again and again, and he agrees to contact Laura with any news or assistance required.

Shadow watches as his former wife and the man who killed her leave the restaurant, watches Laura press her head momentarily against the denim of Sweeney’s jacket before righting herself again, and finds himself smiling.


End file.
